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Natural Awakenings Charlotte

Five Ways to Improve Your Sex Life

Feb 02, 2009 08:43PM
Want to live longer? Improve immune function? Prevent heart disease and cancer? Increase joy and decrease pain? Then improve your sex life. Not only will you be emotionally and spiritually more satisfied, but sexual activity has direct implications on your physical well-being.

Touch. Research shows that physical touch raises oxytocin levels, the hormone that increases trust and decreases cortisol levels, the hormone of chronic stress. In a demanding and sometimes depressing world, the reassuring and comforting touch of a lover can make all the difference in one's outlook and mood. Find times to touch each other throughout the day, and the sexual relationship is sure to benefit.

Get Some Sleep.  A lack of sleep often leads to a lack of sex. Getting adequate rest will provide energy and alertness for all of the day's tasks, and it will also enable partners to engage one another sexually from a place of peace and relaxation. Exhaustion is not sexy, so don't wait until 11pm to initiate sex. If you suffer from insomnia, address it. Fatigue caused by insomnia depresses testosterone levels and negatively impacts libido.

Speak Up.  Even the closest of couples cannot read each other’s minds. The best sex happens when each person knows his or her body and what they want sexually and when they can articulate those desires to their partner. The ability to dialogue openly and honestly about sex is the key to true intimacy.

Laugh More.  Invite humor into the bedroom. One way to keep sex from getting boring is to take a risk and try something potentially awkward or embarrassing. And what's healthier than a good laugh with the one you love?

Make Eye Contact.  Eye contact may be the most primal communication tool humans have and it is vital for creating intimacy. During sex, eye contact can transform a ho-hum experience into one of depth and transcendence.

Becky Knight, MPH is a sexuality educator and coach at Sensovi Institute in Charlotte NC ( She also writes about healthy sexuality on her blog

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